Focusing Problems - Amy Santarelli

I have never had to wear glasses until recently.  As I’ve gotten older, I find myself having trouble reading small print.  I have to hold things farther and farther away to focus well.  People my age joke that their eyes are fine, their arms just aren’t long enough. The most common eye disorders are focusing problems.¹ In fact, if you don’t wear glasses now, you probably will when you get older.  But even if you have never worn glasses, I would guess you still have a focusing problem.  Here are some questions you can ask yourself to help determine if your focus is something you need to change…

When you walk into a room with people in it, what is your center of thought?  Do you worry if people will like you? What they will think of you?  If they will notice your hair or clothes?  Do you wonder if someone will talk to you? Do you try and find your friends right away so you will feel comfortable?  Do you desire to be noticed?   Or do you hope you will be invisible?

If you answered, “yes” to any of those questions, you are likely to have a focusing problem.

The noun definition of focus is “the center of interest or activity.”  What is your center of interest? For most people, the focus is on their own self.   We are naturally selfish and look out first for number one.

I remember the cafeteria at my high school.  It was a huge, noisy place, brimming with my peers, and whenever I had to walk across the room, I felt like everyone was watching me.  I couldn’t even walk naturally, so focused was I on trying to look and move right, and trying most of all to avoid the horror of horrors—tripping and falling!  Then everyone for sure would stare at me and laugh.

Most likely, very few people even noticed me at all.  My perspective of myself was like this quote from Christina G. Rossetti:  “A man is ever apt to contemplate himself out of all proportion to his surroundings.”  I was focused on myself, and I was sure everyone else was, too. 

You would think as a Christian adult, I would no longer have such fears and feelings.  But it wasn’t too many years ago that I was to attend a work function with my husband.  I was very nervous.  What would the other ladies be wearing?  Was I dressed right for the occasion?  There would be a social time before the event, and I knew I would be expected to chitchat and make small talk.  I dreaded it.  I hardly knew them and they were different than me—I didn’t have a paying job and I home schooled our children.  What would I talk about?   Mostly I clung to the arm of my husband and looked forward to leaving. 

What a sad state.  Yes, it is natural to think of ourselves.  But as God’s children, we are no longer bound by those natural, fleshly inclinations.  Philippians 2:3 states, “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind, let each esteem others better than himself.”  Our focus is not to be on ourselves, but on others.  What a novel idea!

When I finally learned this, I no longer dreaded my husband’s work functions.  Instead, I guessed that if I was anxious about meeting and talking with the other wives, it was highly likely that they were nervous as well.  We were probably all insecure and hoping others would be friendly to us.  So I made a decision—I was not going to worry about myself, but instead focus on making others feel comfortable. 

How different that next event was from others before it!  Once I took the focus off myself, I was able to experience the verb definition of focus: “to see clearly.”  I could now clearly see what God wanted me to do when He put me with people—He wanted me to focus on them, to show love and acceptance to them.  To ask them questions, and make them look good.  And when I did so, I left behind the cumbersome burden of making myself look good and was left with the joy of loving others.  And, as it often works in God’s kingdom, when you stop trying to meet your own needs, and meet the needs of others, you’ll find that your own needs will be met.  It really shouldn’t surprise us—God’s kingdom is full of paradoxes and seeming contradictions, starting with Jesus, the Servant-King, the Lion-Lamb, the One who saved us by dying for us. 

So let’s imagine your next social get-together, whether it’s with friends or church, work or school.  First, as you are getting ready, think about what you are wearing and do a check, especially if you are of the feminine gender.  It’s okay to want to look nice—beauty is an attribute of God—but if your motive is to draw attention to yourself, your motive and focus is wrong.  Your focus should be on others, and pleasing God.  Proverbs 16:2 says, “All a person’s ways seem pure to them, but motives are weighed by the LORD.”  If your favorite outfit was dirty or your hair just doesn’t seem to do what it should, remember that it only really matters if you are focusing on yourself.  No one else will probably notice or care! So just smile extra big—smiling covers many a fault.

Then, when you arrive at your destination, examine your first impulse.  Is it to find a seat next to your favorite friend or the popular crowd?  Or even to try and hide so no one notices you?  Either extreme has a selfish, inward focus.  Instead, smile at your friends, but look for that new person or the one sitting alone.  Or if you’re the one sitting alone, swing your focus out to others and see if you can say hello to someone you don’t know.  If you do know everyone there, then work at asking others questions, not trying to show how much you know.  And continually do a motive/focus check on yourself.  By the end of the night, you will most likely find you have made a new friend, helped someone feel more comfortable, and most importantly, pleased God by having a focus that was 20/20 in His eyes.

Mrs. Amy Santarelli is a homeschooling mom and mother of four.

Sources:  www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Eye_disorders_focusing_problems

Image by Mrs. Amy Santarelli

Puppy Chow

Today my article is much different than my previous ones.  I will be sharing a recipe with you to try.  It is one of my favorite snacks and it’s quite easy to make.

First you need to get all your ingredients:

1.      1 cup of chocolate chips

2.      ½ cup of peanut butter

3.      1 stick of margarine/butter

4.      2 to 3 cups of powdered sugar

5.      A box of Rice Chex or Corn Chex (I personally think the Rice Chex taste better)

Now assemble your tools.

To make the coating, put the margarine/butter, chocolate, and peanut butter in a microwave-safe container

Then cook it in the microwave in 1 minute increments on high stirring after each minute until smooth.

Put the Chex into a large bowl and pour the coating on top.

Then mix your coating in with the Chex

When the coating is covering most of the cereal put it in a bag with the powdered sugar

Seal the bag and shake until coated

Place in the refrigerator for 30 minutes or until cold.

Eat and enjoy!

I hope you enjoy making and eating this delicious snack. J

Chipper

The Hard and Dirty Eucharisteo: Part 3 of 3

It was good for me that I have been afflicted, that I may learn Your statutes. 

Psalm 119:71

     You wake up and realize your alarm didn’t go off. Now you’re late for work. As you butter your toast, the bread slips from your hands and lands butter-side-down on the floor. You jump into the car, and the gas meter dings empty. The pump won’t take your credit card. When you zip onto the highway, your coffee spills. Road construction slows you down. And then the vending machine won’t give you your soda after you put your money in, and the change-back button is broken.

     Sounds like a comedy show or comic strip, doesn’t it? Something we read and laugh at. I must admit, I smiled while writing it. But when those incidents occur in our own lives, do we laugh then? How do we respond when we meet trials of various kinds? How should we respond? How do we deal with the hard and dirty eucharisteo? (Reminder: eucharisteo means giving thanks, comprised of the words “grace” and “joy.” This is explained more in depth in my previous article: Learning Eucharisteo.)

     Before we can count it all joy, we must realize “The LORD has made everything for its purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble” (Proverbs 16:4, ESV). God may bring hardships to prove a point, to bring us closer to Him, to let us be an example of Christianity when others are watching, to test us (like Job), to protect us, a combination of all of the above, or for some other reason we finite beings are unaware of at the time.

     Perhaps you were acting proud that morning when the pump wouldn’t accept your credit card, so God taught you a little humility lesson in the form of a broken pump. Perhaps He broke the pump to send you inside the station, because a thug was looking around the pumps to find someone to mug. Perhaps He sent you inside to smile at the cashier who was having a bad day. Perhaps I’m beginning too many sentences with the word “perhaps,” or perhaps I’m not, because we don’t always know why God does things.

     If we are self-absorbed, focusing on how this (really trivial) trail hurts us or offends us, we can’t give thanks to God who gave us the tribulation for a reason. If we’re too stressed, we scowl instead of smile at the cashier, blowing our opportunity to give a blessing.

     Jean-Pierre de Caussade, a Jesuit priest, put it well: “You would be very ashamed if you know what the experiences you call setbacks, upheavals, pointless disturbances, and tedious annoyances . . . are nothing more nor less than blasphemies. . . Nothing happens to you except by the will of God, and yet [God’s] beloved children curse it because they do not know it for what it is.”  We blaspheme when we don’t accept and thank God for our hardships. Once we recognize and acknowledge God’s hand in everything, we can “count it all joy . . . when we meet trials of various kinds” (James 1:2, ESV, emphasis added).

     So instead of exclaiming and slamming your hand on the steering wheel when the gas meter dings empty, which shows anger towards God for putting you in this situation, thank God for this little trial which strengthens your faith in Him. Thank Him for giving you the opportunity to spend time with Him while you wait for the tank to fill up. Thank Him you don’t have to physically pump the gas yourself. Thank Him you have a job to pay for the gas. Thank Him that the car tells you when it’s empty instead of dying in the middle of the road. Thank Him that you have a car! Don’t nitpick the hardships like the Israelites in the wilderness; find the blessings—even the dirty blessings—showered around you.

     Ann Voskamp, author of One Thousand Gifts, describes handling the hard eucharisteo—her sons’ quarrelling—this way, “‘Father, I thank You for these two sons. Thank You for here and now. Thank You that You don’t leave us in our mess . . . Thank You for cross-grace for this anger, for the hope of forgiveness and brothers and new mercies.’” We need to “look for the ugly beautiful, count it as grace, transfigure the mess into joy with thanks,” and eucharisteo really comes to life.

     Of course, this does not come naturally. You have to make a conscious effort to give thanks in all circumstances. You have to encounter many various trials to perfect eucharisteo.

     As I mentioned in my previous article, my life became busier and I gave up my eucharisteo for a stressful life. But then I missed my joy; I missed finding happiness in the little things. So I creased a fresh piece of paper and began again.

     However, one night I forgot to remove my list from my pocket, and the paper full of blessings met its doom in the laundry. As I cradled the wrinkled shreds in my hands, I wondered why God would do this: my list was for Him! But I realized this could be—was—a test, a trial to test my faith in Him. So I accepted the test for what it was: God-given and for a purpose, and I thanked Him. And I realized—He told me—I wasn’t doing my list for Him. I wanted to feel joy for me. And this was His purpose in destroying my list: it was a selfish gift list, not a eucharisteo gift list.

     I confess, even after that test, I slacked in thanking God for the little things. When I volunteered to write on gratefulness for The Though Box, I was convicted of my laziness and my hypocrisy. After writing these three articles, my gift list has become ever more creased and smudged.

     It won’t be easy. Trails will come. But we can count them all joy—we can laugh at them—see the grace in the trials, thank God for them, and draw closer to Him. For thanksgiving comes before the miracle, the miracle of experiencing God’s joy: eucharisteo.

Klipsie

Note: Haiku and Haron discuss some of the aspects I touched on in their own articles, “Why Bad Things Happen” and “Preparing for Hardships.”

Source: One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp

Image by Klipsie

Abstinence, Moderation, Excess

⁶ He who regards one day as special, does so to the Lord. He who eats meat, eats to the Lord, for he gives thanks to God; and he who abstains, does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. ²² So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves. ²³ But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin.

Romans 14:6, 22-23

     On most issues, it seems that there are two ditches—two extremes—people fall into. This is true with drinking. One ditch is the belief that the Bible states that all drinking is wrong—sinful. Alcohol abuse and drunkenness is the other ditch. But is all use of alcohol wrong? Or does the Bible teach that its misuse is wrong? 

     People have ignored what God’s Word teaches about this. For example, the Women’s Temperance movement of the late 1800s and early 1900s played a large role in the legal prohibition of alcohol in the U.S. This organization was considered the “moral watchdog” of the nation. The name of the organization is misleading. It should have more appropriately been called, “The Women’s Prohibition” or “Abolition” Movement. They did not believe in temperance—but rather total abstinence. This organization believed that the problem was any use of alcohol rather than its abuse. 

     Before discussing the Bible’s view on alcohol, let’s remove some misconceptions. A common one is that the meaning of the word translated in the New Testament as “wine” is actually grape juice or possibly even molasses. Actually, there are fifteen words from the Hebrew and Greek translated “wine” in the Bible. Let’s compare these words in the context in which they are used. This will help in better understanding their scriptural meanings. Genesis 9:21 is the first scripture in which wine is mentioned. The Hebrew word used there is yayin. It always means “fermented wine, primarily from grapes.” Notice: “And he [Noah] drank of the wine [yayin], and was drunk.” If Noah became drunk, then he could not have been drinking grape juice. This could not have been anything other than an alcoholic beverage. Now notice verse 24: “And Noah awoke from his wine.” This indicates it was the wine that made him sleep or that had caused him to pass out. Grape juice or molasses does not cause people to pass out. 

     God says that it is not improper to desire wine or strong drink during His annual Feast of Tabernacles, which He commands His people to keep: “And you shall bestow that money for whatsoever your soul lusts after [desires], for oxen, or for sheep, or for wine, or for strong drink, or for whatsoever your soul desires: and you shall eat there before the Lord your God, and you shall rejoice, you, and your household” (Deut. 14:26). Wine can also be used to help you relax and rejoice. King Solomon wrote, “A feast is made for laughter, and wine makes merry” (Ecc. 10:19). There are several places in the Bible where God emphasizes the importance of having a merry heart and enjoying hearty laughter. Modest amounts of wine or other kinds of alcohol can help promote this. 

      Jesus’ first recorded miracle was changing water into wine. Take note that His miracle was not the other way around! He did not change wine into water. Not only did Christ approve of drinking wine, but His miracle was actually for the purpose of providing alcohol for everyone in attendance! The “governor” at the wedding even commented that it was “good wine” (John 2:1-12). If this had merely been grape juice, he would not have said, “but You have kept the good wine until now.” The point is that better wine would normally be consumed at the start of a feast, and the inferior quality should be saved for later, when the taste is not quite as important. This principle certainly does not apply to grape juice. 

     I Timothy 5:23 contains a remarkable statement in the form of instruction from the apostle Paul to Timothy. He wrote, “Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach’s sake and thine often infirmities.” Wine has inherent properties, which are beneficial for the human body. 

      Consider this quote from the director of the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA) in 1966: “‘Numerous well designed studies have concluded that moderate drinking is associated with improved cardiovascular health.' The Nutrition Committee of the American Heart Association also reported in 1966, ‘The lowest mortality occurs in those who consume one or two drinks per day.’” Though these statements were written in 1966, they have stood the test of time and are just as relevant today. Red wine has been proven to contain elements that lower cholesterol and fight cancer. Understanding its value when used in moderation, certain cultures even permit the modest use of alcohol by minors, under close adult supervision, resulting in measurable health benefits. 

     There are some scriptures, which, if not read carefully, do seem to condemn the use of wine. We will see that they do not condemn its right use but rather its wrong use. Nowhere in the Bible does God condemn the use of wine, as long as it is not abused. In fact, as stated above, He encourages the modest use of wine and other strong drink during the Feast of Tabernacles. The moment that over-drinking begins is the moment that sin begins. 

     Let’s now consider Proverbs 23:29-35 (NKJV): “Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has contentions? Who has complaints? Who has wounds without cause? Who has redness of eyes? Those who linger long at the wine, those who go in search of mixed wine. Do not look on the wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it swirls around smoothly; at the last it bites like a serpent, and stings like a viper. Your eyes will see strange things, and your heart will utter perverse things. Yes, you will be like one who lies down in the midst of the sea, or like one who lies at the top of the mast, saying: they have struck me, but I was not hurt; they have beaten me, but I did not feel it. When shall I awake, that I may seek another drink?” This is a description of someone who has consumed way too much alcohol. A drunken man is belligerent, combative, seemingly always ready for a fight—and always complaining about this or that injustice because his senses are in a stupor. Those in this condition commonly seem to imagine themselves as having been wronged. Overuse of alcohol blurs judgment and perception. 

      Is the drinking of wine and other alcohol sinful pleasure, or a healthful life-improving habit? We saw that Christ approved of drinking wine. His actions and words set the example by which Christians are to live. What does God expect of you? He expects you to use alcohol wisely. Jesus has not changed. Hebrews 13:8 states that He is “the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever.” We are to “follow His steps” (I Pet. 2:21-24). This principle is clear. Drinking alcoholic beverages is not wrong or sinful! The misuse of alcoholic beverages is sinful! It is not the bottle that is the problem—it is the person holding the bottle! As with food, money, or anything that has the potential for misuse, moderation is the Bible standard for all true Christians. Paul wrote, “Everyone that strives for the mastery is temperate in all things” (I Cor. 9:25) and “Let your moderation be known unto all men” (Phil. 4:5).


Haron

Image by Leaping Lizard.

Existence of Miracles

"...with God all things are possible."

Matthew 19:26

     These days the term miracle is used so many times from advertising a popular sandwich spread (Miracle Whip) to the title of a hockey movie (Miracle). Most people would agree that a true miracle, were it to happen, would come as a result of some action by a divine being outside of a natural process or law. 

     Many, however, continue to doubt the existence of miracles armed with what appears to be a good reason: they've never seen one. Or so they think. In our present culture, seeing is believing, and with so much misinformation out there, many will distrust assertions that seem out of the ordinary. Many often assume, with the advances of scientific knowledge, that what appears to be a miracle must have a natural explanation. Some people have arrived at their denial of miracles through a commitment to scientific naturalism, a position that states there is nothing beyond the natural world. 

     Every event in the natural can't be explained by a natural cause. Science cannot explain everything. Scientists are making new discoveries everyday, which shows there are many things in our universe they still don't know. Many times in the history of our world, what was thought to be a scientific "law" or "fact", has been disproved many times. The Earth being flat, flies or maggots coming from rotting meat, and even Earth being at the center of the Solar system were once thought to be true. But all have been disproved.Many object to miracles because they are seen as violations of scientific laws that govern nature. Christians define miracles as events that God causes independent of forces in the natural world. God is God. He has the ability to do as He pleases. Events caused and directed by Him can exist alongside nature's laws rather as a violation of them. 

     Miracles lie beyond the realm of scientific proof. But as we know, of course, science cannot prove everything, neither can everything be proved by science. Therefore, the door remains open to consideration of the Bible's miracles, and supernatural causes. And if you think about it, our world, and everything in it, is a miracle itself. 

Haiku

Resources: The Bible; Answers for The World's Toughest Questions Passport by Insight for Living; and Exploring Creation with Biology by Dr. Jay L. Wile

Living with Eternity in Mind

     It’s 2013. For many of us, not much has changed since ten days ago, a time we now refer to as “last year." We’re still the same person, are doing the same things, and still have the same challenges in life set before us as we did then. Solomon expressed his thoughts on this feeling in Ecclesiastes: “What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.”† It seems as though the past few weeks were not only a time to reflect on Jesus’ coming to earth as a baby, spend time with family and friends, and celebrate the new year, but a period in which we escaped the business of life. We make such a big deal about the last night of one year and the first day of the next, yet when they’re past, nothing has physically changed by the temporal mile-marker. Such an event may change the present status, but then it will cease to change.

     The German author and novelist Johann Paul Friedrich Richter, who went under the pseudonym of Jean Paul, once said, “Every man regards his own life as the New Year’s Eve of time.”† To tell the truth, Paul was right. Humans get so wrapped up in themselves sometimes, that they think they’re the final plateau – the next best thing to perfection. We think we’re a reason to celebrate. Since we’re so close to perfection, we only have to do enough to make sure we’re on top: coasting and surviving. We can sit back and watch the party roll on. We don’t realize that compared to the glory of God and that which will be shown in us in heaven, we’re insignificant and ignorant of the wisdom and infiniteness of God and what he created. “Is there anything of which one can say, 'Look! This is something new!'? It was here already, long ago; it was here before our time."†

     But that’s not how God calls us to live our lives. He wants us to put Him first. Our life shouldn't revolve around us, like we sometimes imagine the year to revolve around the split second between December 31^st and January 1^st. Besides, it’s just a dot in time in the midst of 365 days. This should ring a bell. Our lives are just a moment compared to “His story”; just a single frame on an infinite roll of film. Eugene Peterson puts it this way, “If you only look at us, you might well miss the brightness. We carry this precious Message around in the unadorned clay pots of our ordinary lives. That’s to prevent anyone from confusing God’s incomparable power with us. As it is, there’s not much chance of that. You know for yourselves that we’re not much to look at."* We can’t just carry His Message around, holding on to it like a forgotten letter; we have to share it. We aren't letting God shine his “brightness” through us if we don’t follow Him in completing the tasks that he sets before us. We only have a short amount of time here on earth, and He may call us to change our neighborhoods, communities, nations, or even world. Unlike the two days that only succeed in changing the calendar that hangs on your wall, we need to live our lives parallel with God’s plan to change hearts. Our hypothetical headstone should have more than just a dash between two dates: a complete volume of someone who lived their life intentionally, and that, when they came full circle, they had revolved around God.

     Live, not counting your years, but making your years count. Know that only God knows the number to your years, and he will keep it a secret – he’s done it for eternity. Live to glorify him, because if you do, your life will not be something to regret. Stop being the one coasting and barely surviving; be the one that is running the race and thriving. “For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body."†

Justin Gummi

†Scripture quotations are taken from Ecclesiastes and 2 Corinthians in the New International Version, 1984

Jean Paul’s quote was taken from brainyquote.com

*Eugene Peterson’s paraphrase of 2 Corinthians 4:7 was taken from The Message, via biblegateway.com

New Year’s Resolutions!

“If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”

James 4:14

     Welcome to 2013! We are quickly approaching the one year anniversary of The Thought Box, and I can say that this last year has grown me, in many ways. Writing for The Thought Box has taught me many things, and I hope you, as our readers, have learned through our articles as well.

     A new year means new ideas, new opportunities and new goals. At the beginning of each year, we resolve to change our lifestyles, our eating habits, our education level, our income. We seek to acquire a new skill, make new friends. "Out with the old and in with the new" as the saying goes. "What we once had, is no longer good enough," "only good things are to come," and "life only gets better" are all mindsets of the new year. We focus on what is to come, more than we focus on what we have.

     With all the hype about what we are going to do in the upcoming year, I frequently am discouraged by the lack of gratefulness in the focus; I want to lose weight, I want a better paying job, I want a college diploma. I want to be reminded about the simple blessings God has given us, especially as we look toward a new year, full of uncertainty and confusion. (Klipsie has been doing a great job outlining the importance and benefits of wisdom and giving us practical ways to increase our thankfulness in our day to day lives.)

     Looking back on 2012, I can say for sure that nothing that happened last year I had planned on, looked forward to, or was even remotely aware of the possibility of its occurrence. Which brings me to my second point; you don’t know what tomorrow, much less 365 tomorrows, holds. Scripture is full of references to the futility of human foresight. James 4:13-17, “Yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring…” Matthew 6:25-34, “Do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself,” Proverbs 27:1, “Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what the day may bring.” We know nothing about tomorrow, nor what it may bring. We can plan, but any illusions of power - illusions that we control the future - are foolishness. But that doesn't mean that we aren't to plan; just because we can’t see the future does not mean that we get a pass for preparing for it. James 4:13-14 says that instead of saying “today or tomorrow we will” do this or that, we should say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” We are to make our plans with the understanding of the sovereignty of God. 

     So are New Year’s resolutions foolish and pointless? Yes and no. If you drive on an interstate, you have a narrow margin of speed. If you go too fast, you will wreck, if you drive too slow, you will be run into. If you make too many resolutions, if you focus too much on your resolutions, then you will wreck. The uncertainty of the future and the reality of your capabilities will stop your efforts. But on the flipside, if you make no effort for self improvement, either because you believe yourself to be perfect, or because you are too lazy, your life will be slow, uninteresting, and you will miss many opportunities to spread God’s glory. A balance must be struck.

     Why are you resolving? Are you changing your lifestyle in order to fit with the cultural norm? Are you going on a diet to increase your "self esteem" and to reduce the teasing you endure from others? Neither of these is a good reason. Lifestyle changes should only be made in one direction: to bring glory and honor to God. Eternal repercussions should be at the center of our resolutions, both at the beginning of the year, and at the beginning of every day. In the end the temporal, earthly and worldly things – wealth, weight, etc. – don’t matter. What matters is our effect on those around us, glorifying ourselves, or whether we are pointing them to Christ.